ADDICTED TO THE PORN MONSTER!
By: Paul Cook
I first saw pornography in grade school in magazines my friends had. Soon after seeing those magazines I started a masturbation habit. In high school, I experienced the typical teen hormones and often allowed my mind to fantasize about girls. I also pursued physical relationships with girls.
In college I continued to seek porn sources. My relationship with my girlfriend at the time was deeply affected by the porn I had seen. I was soon consumed with the desire for sex and allowed lust to control my mind. Since I did well academically and had an attractive girlfriend, my pride became an additional foothold for the devil. After college I entered the military, and delved further into pornography in its various forms. I also continued to pursue sexual relationships with women.
I thought that getting married would help me break my porn and masturbation habits. I was wrong. I remember my heart racing with adrenaline as I purchased porn mags from the local convenience store, slightly fearful that I might see someone from church. At the time, I was a group leader for the youth ministry, but the fear of being caught wasn't enough to keep me from buying porn. After enjoying the porn for a few days, I would throw it away in shame and disgust, resolving never to look at it again. After a few weeks, I'd be back looking for more. It never brought satisfaction, but only a burning desire for more.
When I got connected to the internet, a whole new dimension of temptations hit me. Suddenly I could visit porn sites freely and secretly, anytime I wanted. The internet offered just about anything imaginable in porn, and I found myself looking regularly. I would plan times to surf for porn when my wife was away or after she went to bed. My addiction was steadily consuming me. I knew I had to stop, but didn't know how to do so.
I knew that God had been calling me back to a relationship with him. I felt the Holy Spirit tugging at my heart and conscience. I started to recognize the deceptive "double life" I was leading: church-going Christian on the outside, sex addict on the inside. I knew it was wrong to look at porn and fantasize about sex, but it seemed too difficult to stop. I could go for 2 or 3 months of "sobriety" before falling again. It seemed like an endless cycle.
The truth about my situation was that I had been building a stronghold for sexual sin for many years by looking at porn, fantasizing and masturbating. This stronghold had become virtually invincible. The images I had viewed over the years were causing my memories to be a constant source of temptation. My porn habit was weakening my marriage and damaging our sex life. I was becoming more excited about looking at porn than being with my wife.
One night in July 1998 at around 2 AM, I could not sleep. I felt a strong prompting to ask God for help in getting free of my sex addiction. Instead of going in to the computer to surf for porn, I went to the living room and got on my knees to pray. I confessed my sin and desire to be free. I asked for God to forgive me and help me. This prayer was a sincere prayer, unlike the many half-hearted prayers I had offered in the past. Though there were no peals of thunder after I prayed, I was able to return to bed and sleep. The next day, I realized that something had changed inside me! God had done a wonderful work in me - I was different - somehow God changed me such that I could resist the urges to view porn and masturbate. I have been completely free of sex addiction since that night!
During the years since then, God has taught me how to walk in sexual purity. I learned about the spiritual side of sexual sin and other temptations. I learned how to receive healing from God and walk with him on a daily basis. I learned how the Holy Spirit plays a key role in helping us live as new persons in Christ. I've written about all of these things in the pages of this website in order to help others escape the snare of sex addiction and walk in victory that God has prepared for them.
If you are struggling with a sexual addiction, I want you to know that you too can have freedom. God is the one who can give you reliable help to permanently break addiction. There is no limit to the ways that God can and will move in your life if you ask him to. Visit our Freedom Testimonials page to read what God is doing in peoples' lives right now.
Editorial Note: Additional insights into sexual addictions (and help) can be found HERE.
Visit Porn-Free.org for online courses to help you to be free in Jesus
PLEASE HELP SHARE THE BEST NEWS GOD HAS FOR EVERY PERSON!
To help us share the Best News every person needs to hear on this planet, randomly click FOR JESUS on just three (3) of the JESUS DID IT! links below. It will take just a few moments of your time. Please - that's all you are asked to do. God will reward you! (Of course, be highly encouraged to forward one or more of these video clips to those who may have never heard what Jesus did for them on the cross ... especially young people). Thank you so much!
JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT! JESUS DID IT!
For anyone living in the continental U.S. who would like 50 FREE copies of JESUS DID IT! to be made available to others, simply email us requesting them and provide us your mailing address.
Our email: firstname.lastname@example.org
(Please paste one of the above links onto your Facebook page - website - blog - video; etc.)
If this testimony has blessed you, would you please take a few moments and share with us HOW it has blessed you? Your feedback is very important. Please mention the author of this testimony and the testimony title when you email your comments. Thank you so very, very much! Email: email@example.com
A Special Message: http://www.precious-testimonies.com/Exhortations/f-j/HelpingShareTheMessageOfTheCross.htm
Dear Reader - are you at peace with God? If not, you can be. Do you know what awaits you when you die? You can have the assurance from God that heaven will be your home, if you would like to be certain. Either Jesus Christ died for your sins, or He didn't (He did!). Are you prepared to stand before God on the Judgment Day and tell Him that you didn't need the shed blood of Jesus Christ on the Cross to have your sins forgiven and get in right-standing with God? We plead with you ... please don't make such a tragic mistake.
To get to know God; to be at peace with God; to have your sins forgiven; to make certain heaven will be your home for eternity; to make certain that you are in right-standing with God right now ... please click here to help understand the importance of being reconciled to God. What you do about being reconciled to God will determine where you will spend eternity, precious one. Your decision to be reconciled to God is the most important decision you'll ever make in this life.
The staff and our ministry supporters so greatly appreciate hearing how God is touching lives for His glory through this outreach. If this ministry has blessed you in some special way, would you please consider taking a brief moment and share your blessing with us? Simply email us at: firstname.lastname@example.org
We truly thank each of you who allow us to publish your testimony, for those who faithfully pray (and fast) for this outreach, for those of you who help support the ministry financially, and for those of you who pass along these testimonies and other ministry writings to others. Especially to prisoners! The part the Holy Spirit has you play is vital in helping win lost souls and being engaged in discipleship, and we can never thank you enough for the labor of love and support you provide on behalf of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Precious Testimoniesis supported financially by those God directs to sow into this ministry. We ask each person reading this to please ask God on an on-going basis if He would have you sow a financial gift to this evangelistic outreach of His - trust that He will clearly communicate His will to you in the matter - then simply be obedient. Please feel free to contact us if you have any questions about the current financial needs of this outreach, or any other questions you may have.
For convenience, you can simply click on the secure Pay Pal donate button below if you want to donate by credit card. Otherwise, you can send your precious gift to:Precious Testimonies, P.O. Box 516, Jenison, MI 49429.
Precious Testimoniesis a non-denominational 501-C-3 evangelistic ministry, and financial love offerings to this ministry are tax-deductible for those who qualify. A financial summary can be viewed by clicking on the following link: Financial Summary.
Inquiries or comments are welcome at our E-mail address
by clicking on the envelope icon below.
Thank You, and God bless you!
Born Again Testimonies | Hope & Encouragement Testimonies | Precious Christian Messages | Dynamic Answers to Prayer | Index
Copyright ' Precious Testimonies. 1998-2006 All rights reserved.
P.O. Box 516,
Jenison, MI 49429
(616) 457-6557 or Fax (586) 314-6784
Like This Page? Send it to a Friend!.