So Why Did I Feel So Empty?
My childhood days were great. I had a loving father and mother and a younger brother and sister. We lived in a nice house, we drove in a nice car and we had a cottage by the ocean with a motor boat where I would spend my summer vacations. Life was good.
My parents would take us to church each Sunday but by the time I was a teenager I stopped going. What a waste of time I thought, sitting there each Sunday morning for what seemed forever.
I graduated from university and was able to get a good paying job. I had a fancy sports car and was able to buy my own house at the age of twenty-five. I had lots of friends and we would party a lot. Life was good.
By age thirty, even though it seemed I had it all, I must admit I had an empty place within me. There was something missing. I thought perhaps it was time to settle down and get married. I met a great girl and we were married. I have a great wife, but still I had this empty place within me, there was something missing.
Someone talked to me about church. I thought to myself, maybe this is what I need, so I decided to try church again. It was still boring. What a waste of time. I was still in desperate need of something. I decided there had to be more to church, so I went on a search for the “more”. I didn’t know what the “more” was, but I was determined to find it. I knew doing church for an hour each Sunday morning was not cutting it for me.
I started going to meetings anywhere that talked about “God”. At some of these meetings I found people talking about having a relationship with “God”. That is weird I thought. How could this be possible? The more I thought about it, the more I began to think maybe this was what I was missing. I kept going to meetings trying to find out more and more about this relationship thing. Then one day, someone said to me: “You can have a relationship with God and it is simple, just read your Bible and pray.” Ugh! was my reaction. I have to read my Bible and pray? There must be an easier way!
I was determined to find out more about this relationship thing so I did start reading my Bible. I must admit it was a struggle. Whatever I read just didn’t register with me. It was a painful process, but over time (a long time) things started to connect with me. I did get to a point where I now have a relationship with God – the Creator of the universe! Crazy idiot you are probably thinking. All I can say is… the relationship is real! He helps guide me through life. He helps me with decisions. Sometimes I will think one way and His way is totally opposite, but whenever I do it His way, it always works out for the better.
Is life perfect for me now that I have a relationship with Jesus Christ? The answer is no. Do I still have struggles? The answer is yes, but without this relationship I sometimes wonder just how much more difficult life would be without Jesus in my life.
If you have this emptiness inside you, I strongly encourage you to hook up with Jesus. Try it! You have probably tried all the other stuff, so why not try Jesus. He will indeed fill that emptiness inside you.
Everyday we can choose to walk with integrity. This morning I was faced with a decision. I returned equipment to a rental store before it opened. I had accidentally broken a small part, but I was sure they would not even notice it. My dilemma was whether I should tell them or forget about it. I’d rather not tell them, but something down deep inside wouldn’t let me off the hook. I went back to the store and told them about the part I had broken. Their response?
They hadn’t noticed it and were appreciative of my honesty. They said not to worry about it; they would fix it at their own cost.
You might be wondering why this was such a big deal? Because before I knew the Lord, I wouldn’t have reported it, but I would have had a guilty conscience about it. Now I have a clear conscience without the weight of guilt.
You might be a person who feels that church is just about a bunch of rules. I’ve heard people say, “Why go to church to hear about rules?” “Not me.” “I’m a decent person and I don’t need church.”
Other people think religion is just a crutch. At one time when I heard Christians say they needed a job and were just going to pray about it, I’d brand them as “crazy idiots.” I thought people should just get out there and get a job instead of sitting around praying about it. But I know that my life was easy; with good paying jobs, friends and toys. However, in spite of all the good things in life, I still had a hunger to know what else there was; still had a gnawing on the inside to find out if there was more.
And when I started searching, I found that just like everyone else, I needed Jesus.
I will leave you with my favorite verse in the whole Bible. Verse 9 of 1 Corinthians chapter 2, it says: “No eye has seen, no ear has heard and no mind has imagined what God has prepared for those who love Him.” Think about it. We can’t even imagine the plans (good plans) the Lord has for us. Wow! That is awesome!
above testimony is from the
STORIES Testimony Book (Lighthouse Edition). There are 48 powerful testimonies in this book. If you would like to learn
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